I made a comment on someone’s Blog and it made me think. What did I say that for? What does that really mean?
So, I decided to jot down a few common sayings and try to decipher them. I'll start with the one I wrote in the Blog.
Funny as hell
Did I hear anyone laughing down there? Who said Hell is funny?
Cold as hell
OK, who’s been down there and checked the temperature lately? I always heard about fire and brimstone, but not snow and ice.
It’ll blow your mind
Now that would be a disgusting sight I can assure you.
You’re driving me up a wall.
I have never seen someone drive up a wall in my life, have you?
You can’t have your cake and eat it too
Now this is a good one. Every year my wife makes me a cake for my birthday and…I EAT IT! "Honey, here's your cake but sorry, you can't eat it. You have to go feed it to the chickens!"
Straight as a die
Do you even know what a “die” is? I can tell you this much, there’s nothing straight about it!
Going out of my mind
I didn’t know you were in your mind in the first place! But please let me know how you got out.
Slower than cold tar
OK, is “hot tar” fast or what? The only time cold tar moves is when it’s in the back of a speeding truck.
She’s built like a brick sh*t house
I’ve heard this one from all you male ego’s out there. That equation is terrible! Who ever said ANY sh*t house was beautiful is LOCO!
Dumber than a post
Do you have something against posts? I must be in the stone age because I didn’t even know posts had brains. They do their job just fine by standing there holding up the fence.
Scared the hell out of me
Why do we insist on associating “hell” with everything and everyone?
You can lead a horse to water but you can’t make it drink
Not if you have a stubborn horse. I’d like to see you pull a
1000 pound bucking bronco.
Sicker then a pig
I have a friend who has a pet pig that actually saved his owners life from a house fire. The pig sleeps in his bed with him and his wife!
What an oxymoron!
You totally cracked me up
Wouldn’t that be a sight?
Made you sit back and say mmm…didn’t I?